


Put Your Mouth Where Your Money Is

by rebelwriter6561



Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies), X-Men (Movieverse)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Drunken Kissing, First Kiss, M/M, Stupid Drunken Bets, Warren has history he needs to work out, implied past sexual abuse, that boy needs therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-22
Updated: 2016-07-08
Packaged: 2018-07-16 17:24:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7277146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rebelwriter6561/pseuds/rebelwriter6561
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kurt and Warren have a talk about true love and first times. It all goes downhill from there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This ship came out of nowhere and punched me in the face. I love it.
> 
> also [saberghatz](http://saberghatz.tumblr.com/) made [art](http://saberghatz.tumblr.com/post/151003117069/okay-so-blasphemous-lies-and-deceits-nightangel) of this fic and its beautiful

The setting sun was painting the sky as red as fresh blood, but the pair down on the lawn were too wrapped up in each other to admire the beauty. Their quiet conversation didn't carry to the roof, but Warren could guess that it was full of nonsense words of love and promises and other shit.

He scowled at the sight and took another drink of stolen vodka. Down there were two mutants taking their first stupid steps towards fumbling around together, and he couldn't even hear enough to get a good laugh about it. He could guess, though, from the body language, that the boy was going to cop a feel before the sun was down. That's what he would aim for.

“ _Hallo, Engel._ ” Warren jumped at the voice, even though he had heard the telltale noise of the teleporter. He always appeared too suddenly for Warren's brain to catch up to his ears.

He glared at his new company. “Do you always have to come up here?” he snapped.

Nightcrawler’s - Kurt's - face fell. “I'm sorry, I just wanted to see you. I know, you've asked me to leave you alone.” Warren sighed, because, yeah, he'd said that, but he’d been dealing with a concussion and broken bones from _getting crashed in a goddamn plane_. At the time, he didn't want to see anyone, much less someone he'd so recently tried to kill.

But feathers grew back, bones healed, especially ones as light as his, and he got over it. If he held a grudge against every mutant he fought he'd never have any rest. Kurt had won their fight, both of them, and while he wasn't necessarily _happy_ about that, he could get over it, and be civil if he needed.

Kurt, though, was so ridiculously over-the-top _nice_ , all the damn time. He kept trying to be friendly, even when Warren was an asshole (which was often). It seemed that while Warren had gotten over their squabble by just accepting it, Kurt was still trying to make up for burning his wing and inadvertently getting him picked up by a “god”. 

And as cool as it was to be on good terms with someone who could teleport - and could be taken advantage of for getting into places - most of the time it was really fucking annoying.

“Look, when I'm up here I want to be alone, alright? It's fine otherwise.” Warren went back to staring at the view, hoping Kurt would take the hint, but instead the blue mutant sat down next to him.

“Why do you want to be alone? Won't you get lonely?” Kurt was all big red eyes and caring voice, and Warren would be suspicious if that wasn't Kurt's deal, _all the damn time_.

“I'm not lonely. I've got fucking pigeons for company. And dumbass teenagers making out.” Warren gestured towards the lawn, where sure enough, the pair had moved up to playing tonsil hockey. “That's good enough, right?” he snapped sarcastically.

As usual, Kurt missed the sarcasm. He was too busy watching the show. “Oh, look, young love,” he sighed.

Warren snorted. “Yeah, right. Young lust, if nothing else.” He drank again and offered the bottle to Kurt, who took it reluctantly. “There's a difference, you know?”

“I was raised in the circus, not the convent.” Kurt said, surprisingly firmly. “There's a difference, you know?” He surprised Warren again by taking a large drink of vodka, not even grimacing when he swallowed it down.

“Yeah, but you can't say they're in love. That's just hormones making them do something stupid. They just need to have sex and get it over with.” Warren said bitterly as he yanked the bottle back from Kurt. He couldn't believe he was discussing fucking love with Kurt fucking Wagner. Maybe he was drunker than he thought. The world was getting a little wobbly.

“You can't think that! What if they are truly in love. Don't you think maybe this is simply the beginning of a beautiful thing?”

Warren scoffed. “Anyone who thinks first love is true love is full of it. They think that they're special, and it'll last and be all pure or some shit, then it all falls apart, because it doesn't work.” That, in Warren's experience, is always what happened.

“You are too harsh.” Kurt said stiffly. “Even you can-”

“Even I can _what_?” Warren snapped. He was getting pretty tired of this conversation.

“Even you can agree, even though this might not be true love or whatever you're saying, even you can agree that this will be a good thing for them.” Kurt gestured at the pair, who looked like they were getting pretty handsy. Warren had guessed right.

“Uh, how is clumsily grabbing at some girl's tit a good thing?” Warren was pleased when Kurt blushed, or in his case just turned purple. It was hard to tell with the light. He looked purple all over in the sunset.

“They're learning.” Kurt stressed the second word. “Maybe they'll learn that they're not right for each other, maybe they'll learn what they like from kissing. It's a good thing.” Kurt said this like it was a triumphant end to the conversation.

Warren laughed. “So you think making out and having sex is all just a learning experience?” He chuckled. “God you sound like a fucking virgin.”

“So what if I am?” Kurt looked embarrassed to admit it.

“Of course you are. If you weren't you'd _know_ that a first time doing _anything_ is never good. Okay? First kiss, first fuck, whatever, it's not good.” Warren considered himself an expert in “bad-idea sex”, since that was all he ever had.

He sneered at Kurt, feeling mean from the vodka and bad memories. “First hand-hold, in your case. Tell me it didn't suck.”

Kurt wasn't watching the view anymore. He was staring at his weird hands, probably thinking about having them held. Or would he even have gotten that far with someone before, Warren wondered. His hands were pretty goofy, they'd be hard to hold.

“First times are never good.” he repeated, more to himself than Kurt. He'd been too drunk to remember his first time, but he could guess that was a good thing. Better not to remember.

“Prove it.” Kurt said suddenly, straightening to face Warren.

“Prove what?” Warren asked. His words were slurring, and he was having a hard time focusing on Kurt. As the night got darker, the mutant was getting harder to see. But he looked serious, without the sweet-but-shy grin he always showed Warren.

“You say firsts are always bad. So prove it. Kiss me.”

“Wha- fucking what?” Warren yelped in shock. Was he hearing shit now? Good little virgin Catholic boy wanted a kiss? 

“This would be a first kiss, yes? You say it will be terrible, I say not.” Kurt leaned close, getting into Warren's personal space. “Show me otherwise. Put your mouth where your money is.”

“That's not how it goes.” Warren mumbled. He leaned away from Kurt and had to stop moving when the world moved too. “I'm not gonna fucking kiss you.”

Kurt smiled evilly, teeth glinting in the last light of the sun. When did he start looking like the devil in a tight t-shirt, instead of the blue dork he always was? “No? Fine then. I didn't think you'd have it in you anyway.”

Ooh, now it was a challenge. Warren loved a challenge. He finished the bottle of vodka in one gulp and struggled out of his leather jacket, suddenly warm in the cool night. Kurt's tail kept flicking in the corner of his eye. The other boy, instead of looking nervous like Warren would have thought, instead looked like a cat that ate a flock of songbirds. Smug little prick.

“I'll fucking show you.” Warren pushed himself closer to Kurt, sliding along the ledge, his wings trailing after him. This was probably dumb, since Kurt-the-fucking-German-virgin wouldn't know how to kiss for shit, so Warren was sure to win. Just another fight between them.

But hey, he was always doing dumb things while drunk, like getting in fights and joining cults. What's another dumb decision for the list?

“Ready for this, blue boy?” He asked as he leaned in, ready for this to be over. Kurt, it seemed, had other ideas, and shot up to meet his mouth halfway.

Warren almost pulled back in surprise, from the intensity and suddenness of the kiss. Kurt must have known that was coming, because his hands all of a sudden were resting against Warren's cheeks and he was holding him still, while kissing harder. Warren tried to remember what the goal was here, but he got caught up in the feeling of Kurt's mouth on his. 

It was nice, nicer than he remembered kissing to be. Kurt was kissing him firmly, but he was gentle, not forcing his head to move or pulling his hair. He liked that - it was different. Warren closed his eyes, kissing back and relaxing under Kurt's hands.

That had the unintended side effect of making every other sensation stronger. Kurt's lips were nice and warm, and when they opened under Warren's he made a quiet noise that went straight to Warren's gut. He was a bit surprised when Kurt's tongue sneaked into his mouth, but he allowed it. He didn't think Kurt would be the one taking charge like this, but he liked it.

Now he was the one reaching out to grab Kurt, because the other boy was nice and warm and he wanted him closer. Kurt went willingly when Warren weakly tugged on his shirt, almost crawling into Warren's lap, still leading the kiss. Warren's wings pulled up around them, darker under the light of the stars. Closing them off into their own little world.

He didn't know...how was this so good? Had kissing always been able to be nice like this, and he'd been missing out the whole time? Or was it just Kurt? Why hadn't they done this instead of fighting? This was more fun, and felt so much better than a punch to the face. He could feel the blood rushing in his veins, driving him wild. Goosebumps raced over his skin, every nerve felt on edge. It was like kissing lightning, but it didn't hurt. It didn't hurt at all.

Kurt was changing things up, nipping at Warren's mouth with lips and a hint of sharp teeth. Warren sucked in his breath in shock - it wasn't even painful, but it sent a jolt of pleasure through his body when Kurt kissed it better. God he was good. No way he was a virgin.

Warren pushed forward, arms moving around Kurt's back to grab hold of his jacket. He wanted...he wanted more, which was a new feeling for him. He didn't want to stop, he wanted the other mutant gasping his name while he writhed under him. God, he wanted to fuck Kurt raw. His hands moved lower, grabbing his ass through his thick jeans.

Kurt pulled back with a gasp. He jumped out of Warren's lap before he could grab him, and when Warren tried to follow he ended up toppling to the floor, landing in a painful pile of wings. Head spinning, Warren looked up at Kurt, feeling empty and alone again. “Wha-?”

“I win.” Kurt said breathlessly. He was looking at Warren with shock and confusion too, tail whipping the air around him. And then he vanished in a puff of smoke, leaving Warren alone. And drunk. And horny.

Asshole.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is titled "Warren-Has-Emotions-and-Everyone-Suffers"  
> Warnings for mentions of past sexual abuse, nothing explicit. And Warren is alarmingly blasé about it. Boy really needs therapy.

There was always a time for thinking things through, to go over options, and not making any rash decisions. To be an adult and do things coolly, and logically. If Warren wanted to, he could take the time to really think things over, decide what was best, and make a plan to discuss things properly.

But fuck that.

With a hard shove, he sent Kurt careening into the wall, almost toppling a vase-topped column in the process. Warren followed, getting right up in his space, bringing his wings up to block the views of the students around them, and cut off Kurt's line of sight. The blue mutant looked ready to bolt, but that wasn't gonna happen. With one hand, he grabbed Kurt's shirt collar and the other snatched his tail.

Kurt wasn't going anywhere.

“You...fucking...cheated.” Warren ground out. His whole face and head hurt, an all-around ache punctuated by sharp stabbing pain. After Kurt had left him alone on the roof, he'd found his bottle of whiskey and only got through two swallows before he was sick.

He'd made it back to his room before passing out half on his bed, and woke up horribly hungover, and furious. The hurt and shock he'd felt when Kurt teleported away had simmered overnight, and now he was boiling mad.

“I...what?” Kurt looked like he was about to fall apart in fear, all big red eyes and trembling fists. His tail was going nuts in Warren's grip, alternately wrapping around his wrist or straining against it. Warren had heard of lizards who cut off their own tails to escape predators, and he wondered if Kurt was considering it.

Warren moved closer, crowding him into the wall and glaring down at him. “I said, you fucking cheated. That was an unfair challenge, and you took advantage of me being drunk, you piece of shit.” 

Kurt's expression turned horrified, but Warren didn't care. He was too mad to give a shit. Twisting his wrist around the tail, he used Kurt's gasp of pain as a distraction and pinned him to the wall. He knew Kurt could feel the pressure holding him there, feel the strength and power fueled by rage. Apocalypse had shown him how to really get in touch with how dangerous he could be. 

He stepped as close as he could to Kurt, right into his breathing space. Last night when they'd been this close the air seemed heated, but now there was only cold between them.

“Don't you _ever_ come near me again, understand?” He shook his hand clutching the shirt to prove his point. “I am fucking _done_ with you and your bullshit. So fuck off, you hear me?” He shouted in Kurt's face.

Kurt's eyes were screwed tight, and he whimpered as he nodded. Warren had no pity for him though. He was past that point.

Warren felt a hand land on his shoulder. “Hey, leave him alone.”

“Fuck off Summers,” Warren snapped. He unfurled his wings, making the blind kid step back so he wouldn't get hit. His talons left grooves in the dark wood walls when he stepped away.

“We're done here,” he said, more to the surrounding crowd than to Kurt, who was staring at him with tears in his eyes that Warren ignored. The blue kid vanished away the second Warren let go of his tail.

Warren pushed through the crowd, stalking away from everyone and headed outside. It was warm, muggy and unpleasant, too close to summer to be called spring. Warren got almost to the edge of the property before he slowed and stopped, pulling the heavy air into his lungs.

Normally after a fight, he was left cold and shaking as the adrenaline left, and he always came down and crashed hard, no matter how hard he tried to fight it. But this, _this_ , this wasn't a fight and it wasn't over, and it wasn't the loss of adrenaline shaking his closed fists now.

He could feel the rage twisting in his body, making it hard to breathe and focus. Pent up, couldn't escape, couldn't let go. He wanted to fight someone, he wanted to scream, he wanted to go back to Kurt and demand to know ‘why’ and ‘how could you’ and ‘what did I do’-

“Hey!”

Another angry voice. Warren saw that it was Peter this time, running in out of nowhere, his normally impish face a mask of anger. Oh, _he_ was mad, sure…

“The hell is your problem, man? What’d Kurt do to-”

“Fuck off!” Warren screamed. He couldn't hold it back, he had no control, he'd had enough. “All of you, just fuck off and leave me alone!” Shouting wasn't working, Peter was still standing there trying to say something, so Warren did the only thing he could to escape. He opened his wings and flew. 

No one could come after him in the air. He could get above all of them. He flew, up and higher, until his lungs burned and wings ached from effort. He found a thermal of rising warm air and locked his wings, angling his body, and just floated.

Held up on hot air...he snorted when the thought crossed his mind. The ground was far away, no one could touch him here, he didn't have to deal with jackasses asking questions or assholes trying to make him feel bad. There was no one up here but himself.

But that was almost worse. Warren groaned as he tried to push his wind-whipped hair out of his face. Left alone with his thoughts, he kept thinking back to that night, and growing angry, again. But now the rage was turning inwards.

He was mad at Kurt, for kissing him then leaving, and he was mad at himself because that _hurt_ , and since when did he start caring when someone did that? One nice kiss and it felt like he had a hole in his chest. He'd been drunk, and then _feelings_ happened, and now he couldn't think right.

He thought...he thought Kurt was different, that he wasn't like every other man or woman that put their lips to his. But Kurt had used him, probably just wanted to see if he could kiss the captive angel for laughs, then left Warren alone. He made Warren feel good, for the first time in forever, like there wasn't something wrong with him, but abandoned him when he got what he wanted.

He didn't used to care. People were shit, and they did shitty things to him, like trap him in a ring and make him fight to the death, or lay there looking pretty while they projected their sick angelic fantasies on him. He told himself it didn't bother him. He'd always gotten something out of it - a warm bed, food, the thrill coming from the kill.

Warren pressed his wrists to his burning eyes. How dare he fall for it? How had he bought that, right after their talk about first kisses and bad times? He'd walked right into it like an idiot. He'd even enjoyed it. Now he wondered if they'd continued, would Kurt have shown him the same kindness in the bedroom. He was too good at kissing to be a virgin, he probably would have shoved Warren into bed and had his way with him. Warren's insides curled at the thought. He hated those types.

He was an idiot, but Kurt was a piece of shit, and he never wanted to see the blue mutant again. But he had to remain at the school, because there was literally nowhere else for him. He had nothing - no future, no family or friends, nowhere to go. He was trapped like in the ring, except there was no fence to hold him in. Just smiles and expectations.

It still hurt, whenever he thought of Kurt and how close he had clung to Warren. How his face looked when Warren was yelling at him. He had no right to be upset, but neither did Warren. It was just a kiss, just a challenge he lost. Logically, he knew he shouldn't be this angry and upset.

But he was.

Way far up in the sky, all alone where no one could see, Warren let a few frustrated tears go. They dried immediately in the updraft.

~*~

It was growing dark when he finally let himself down. His stomach was cramping, reminding him that he hadn't eaten all day, and was still sour with alcohol. His rage had died down to a low simmer that would curdle inside until the next time he was angry. But he was tired, and sore, and wanted to eat.

The halls were thankfully empty, and he raided the snack cabinet in the kitchen under the peering eyes of a handful of students. He was sure news of his and Kurt's little encounter had spread through the school, and everyone was avoiding his eyes more than usual.

There was no sign of any professors or any of Kurt's friends waiting for him outside his room. He entered and aimed at the bed, looking to get stuffed on sweets, but his foot slid on something on the floor. It was a folded piece of notebook paper, with his name on top.

He managed to ignore it for an hour and a half, as he listened though his favorite album. Finally, the lure became too much, and he carefully unfolded the paper like it would blow up at him.

_Warren,_

_I am so very sorry for what I did. I did not mean to cause you harm, but I have, and I take full blame for my actions and accept whatever consequences come of it. Your anger at me is fully justified, and I do not ask your forgiveness - what I did cannot be pardoned._

_Please know that I will do whatever I can to make it right, although I know nothing can truly fix what happened. You said to leave you alone, and I shall. I do not expect another kind word or action from you ever again. And that is fine._

_I just want you to know I am very very sorry. Even if we never speak again, even if you don't read this note, I just want you to know that._

_I'm sorry,_

_Kurt_

The handwriting was shaky, and there seemed to be teardrop stains smearing the some words. Warren collapsed on his bed, mind turning. Was this a trick? Was Kurt sitting somewhere laughing at him, keeping his sick joke running.

Kiss the angel and make him fall in love, even when he said it would never happen…

Warren curled in on himself, chest aching. This was Kurt, _Kurt_ , whose first words to him were an apology, who tried so hard to make him happy. Kurt who had kissed him so perfectly, like he wasn't sure he'd ever have the chance.

Kurt who sent him a tear-soaked note of promises to leave him alone, because he knew that Warren was hurting. Somehow he knew.

Warren's fist crumpled the paper in his grasp, and he covered his face, feeling like he was going to burst apart all over again. But not from anger at Kurt.

Warren had fucked up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love all comments.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry to everyone I emotionally compromised with that chapter (lol not really, I feed off of distress)  
> I'll try to make it right.

Warren actually got his ass out of bed at a reasonable time, because god forbid he miss a second day of class and fuck up his slim-to-impossible shot at a GED. And there was no point in staying in bed putting things off. Sooner or later he'd have to face the professors demanding an explanation, or one of Kurt's friends. And he would do it on two hours of sleep.

But really, the only thing that mattered today was facing Kurt. He needed to talk to the other mutant. He just didn't know how. And he felt like crawling in a hole every time he thought about it.

Most of the night had been spent tossing and turning, thinking over the note. Seeing Kurt's apology in paper had solidified it in his mind, chasing out his own thoughts that Kurt was tricking him. But now that it was clear in his head, it was too hard to believe. He couldn't imagine why Kurt had kissed him in the first place. He wanted to know why.

There was also the possibility that Kurt wouldn't ever want to see him again. He'd have to deal with that too.

Breakfast was in full noisy swing when Warren stumbled in, but the dull roar quieted to hissing whispers when he stepped up to the line. Warren ignored the noise as he helped himself to French toast and too many sausage links. His head was still stuck on Kurt, and he should be thinking about algebra, but the blue mutant wouldn't leave his mind.

He was sitting, not even eating, and considering his tenth impossible option when another tray noisily joined him. He glanced up to see Ororo’s warm grin, and smiled back. At least Ororo was by his side, especially since they'd gone to hell and back together. At least he still had one friend. He shook off his miserable thoughts and started eating when she did.

“You know what's weird?” Ororo piped up after a few minutes of silence. She was examining the sticky bottle of syrup another student had left on their table. “Maple syrup isn't actually listed as an ingredient here.”

“That's because it's not real maple syrup. It's chemicals, it's corn syrup flavored with maple flavor.” Warren gestured with a piece of sausage at the sticky plastic. “There's nothing natural in that bottle.”

Ororo considered the bottle and cheerfully dumped it on her toast with a shrug. “It tastes good, so who cares?” she smiled as she began stuffing her mouth. As someone who had also spent a lot of time hungry, Warren could relate.

“You've never had real maple syrup, have you? The stuff that actually comes from trees?” Ororo shook her head, and Warren sighed in exasperation. “I'll get you a bottle, it just doesn't compare.”

“Nice,” Ororo grinned, and Warren relaxed. It didn't sound like she was going to grill him about what went down with Kurt, maybe…

“You know what else is weird? You and Kurt are both acting like yesterday didn't happen.” Warren groaned and dropped his head, causing his curls to fall in his eyes. Here it came… “Like everything's fine, and nothing happened. It's amazing; did you plan this?”

“Drop it, Storm. Please.” Warren begged. He really didn't want to talk about this with anyone other than Kurt. 

“Like you didn't spend all yesterday in a floating rage while Kurt was crying under the bed. But those are opposite reactions, aren't they?” She cocked her head at him, a searching look on her face.

Warren couldn't look her in the face. Kurt...he did that to him. He knew Kurt had cried, he had physical evidence on a piece of paper in his room, but hearing Ororo say it felt like someone stabbed him in the chest. He could picture it, so easily. He'd done that.

He felt like the lowest piece of filth on earth.

He covered his face with his hands, eyes burning. Was Kurt still hiding in his room, or would he run into him in the hall, walking around like nothing was wrong, when really everything had gone to shit and it was all Warren's fault. How could he look Kurt in the face, _talk_ to him again, knowing that? _How was he going to fix this?_

Orofo was snapping her fingers by his ear. “Earth to Warren, hello? Come on, look at me.” When Warren finally looked up, she gave him a look of sad knowing. “I hate to say this, but it's a good thing you're miserable, because if you weren't I would kick your ass.”

“I want to kick my own ass, if that helps.” Warren was aware how tight his voice sounded. He wasn't sure if he could eat any more - his stomach was in knots.

“I'm sure Peter or Scott could help with that.” Ororo sighed. “Look, I know you don't want to talk about this, but we're all really worried about the two of you. You're _miserable_ , and so is Kurt, and we don't know how to help at all.”

“I don't need your help.” Warren bristled. Why the hell would they want to help him? After what he did?

“Yeah, we got that when you flew off yesterday. But we are your friends, Warren. We're worried, whether you like it or not. It's called empathy, and it's a perfectly healthy emotion. You're such a stunted little brat I'm sure you wouldn't know what that is.”

“Ouch.” Warren whined and gave Ororo a hurt look. “Was that necessary?”

“I'm not wrong,” Ororo asserted. “You're acting like a child. You're not facing whatever happened between you very well, and you're making Kurt and yourself suffer.”

“I'll fix it,” Warren said quietly. He wished they weren't talking about this in public.

“Oh, yeah? What's your plan?” Her expression was like a smug teacher's who knew the student didn't know the answer. It made Warren mad just looking at it.

“I don't fucking know, okay? I got nothing. You wanna be a friend? You wanna help? Figure out if Kurt will even talk to me. Cause if I were him I'd never want to see me again.” Chest tight, Warren stood up and grabbed his tray. He couldn't sit still anymore, he felt like the walls were closing in again and he had to get out. 

But he couldn't. Running away makes things worse. He didn't even have that anymore.

Ororo, bless her, followed him doggedly when he dumped his tray and stomped out. “The good news is he doesn't hate you,” she offered as she trotted to keep up with him. “Bad news is he won't leave his room. Or at least we can't catch him out of his room. Teleporter, you know.” 

“Well, great,” Warren moaned. Ororo nodded and steered him to their supplemental math class instead of towards the main doors like he'd been aiming at. “How do you know he doesn't hate me?” he asked quietly.

“It's Kurt. I don't think he can _hate_ anyone.”

Warren scoffed. “You don't know what I did.” He didn't know if Kurt had said anything to their friends about the kiss, or the real reason for the fight, but it seemed not. Was he embarrassed, or just didn't want to ever think about it?

“Okay, but like I said, it's Kurt. You know how he is. He thinks the world of you.” Ororo stopped him with a hand on his arm, looking very serious. “You have no idea how much you hurt him yesterday.”

“No, I'm pretty sure I do-” Warren tried to say, but Storm cut him off again.

“No, Warren, listen. He likes you, you know? Like, _likes you_ likes you.” Ororo squeezed his arm, just a little, but enough to tell him that it could really hurt if she wanted it to. “I don't know if that's got anything to do with your fight-” 

“It does.” Warren admitted. His heart was hurting again, aching with the knowledge of just how hard he had fucked up. If Ororo was right, Kurt’s kiss had just been a test, a bold move to see if Warren felt the same way. And Warren had responded only with rage. 

He'd probably broken Kurt's heart. And that thought, of losing the chance to be with Kurt before it'd even begun, hurt a thousand times more than anything else.

“Okay then.” Ororo sighed. “Is this something...do you...dammit Warren, do you want to make up with Kurt or _kiss_ and make up with him? That's what I'm asking.”

“Kurt won't ever want to be with me after this.” Warren swallowed, feeling hopeless and alone again. The more Ororo talked, the more impossible it seemed. Kurt, bright and happy, kind Kurt, wouldn't want anything to do with a piece of shit like him. Dirty, used, and harsh Warren, who would never be what everyone dreamed he would be. It was a fucking hopeless joke.

“You don't know that! If you can just talk about it, I know-” Ororo broke off when the squeaking of rubber wheels on wood reached their ears. The pair turned to see Professor X approaching them.

“Ororo, would you mind getting off to class? I have some things I'd like to discuss with Warren.” The professor's smile seemed open, but Warren could only guess exactly what the professor wanted to discuss.

And he guessed it wasn't good.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bear with me while I try to sort out this screwball's life.

“Please, take a seat,” Xavier offered as he rolled up his desk. Warren sprawled uncomfortably on the wooden chair in front of the professor, wondering what this would be about. Was it the fight with Kurt, and this was the professor's attempt at being an understanding ear to soothe the wounds? Or would he simply tell Warren that time was up, get out of this fancy house, you don't belong?

“So, Warren. How have your classes gone? I know your GED test is soon.”

“Uh, they're fine.” Oh, this was about school, of course. Warren shifted uncomfortably. He couldn't be at ease around the professor, especially because he was pretty much the reason he didn't have hair anymore.

“Your teachers have pointed out that you are very bright, and determined when you put your mind to it. I'm sure you're well aware of their...complaints.” Xavier grinned at him, and Warren sheepishly shrugged. He had a reputation for a reason, after all.

He'd never been to a proper school, ever, in his life. It'd been tutors and nannies, who avoided looking at him if they didn't have a reason. Warren, and the bloody fuzzy stumps coming from his back. It hadn't taken him very long to figure out they were scared of him. They never stayed long.

He knew he was smart, because what was there to do while imprisoned in a mansion of a house except read or cause trouble? When he was kicked out, he learned more, about people and history and languages, more than he ever could from books. And if he didn't grasp anything the first try, then he just kept at it until he was good.

And now he was expected to sit quietly behind a desk, and blindly accept whatever some struggling teacher tried to tell him. That went about as well as expected.

“Have you given any thought as to what you'll do once you have your GED?” Professor X asked, and Warren froze. He couldn't even think about it. That question never failed to paralyze him and leave him hollow, wondering ‘what do I do?’

It didn't used to be like this. In Europe, even before he was in the ring, there was no expectation except impending death, because it was hell out there and everyone was ready to kill him. Now, he was expected to have a future again, and be a productive member of society.

And he didn't know what the fuck to do with his life. It wasn't as if he could walk into a business and ask to be hired with a ten-foot pair of wings coming out of his back. He didn't even have any useful skills to offer. He was, as his esteemed father would say, a useless bum mooching off society. 

And normally he would revel in the title and be the best damn useless piece of shit in existence, but he needed to be better, be the kind of person Kurt would want him to be. He just didn't have a fucking clue how to do it.

“I have some options for you, if you wish to hear me out.” The professor obviously knew the mental block Warren was in. “If you choose to leave, I have a list of mutant-friendly or mutant owned businesses you could apply to. All have been personally verified by Hank or myself.” he assured after seeing Warren's disbelieving nose wrinkle. “If you're willing to work hard and learn, you'll be exactly what they're looking for.

“Okay,” Warren said dully. It honestly sounded like hell, but it was something. _Those businesses_ were something. He had no idea that was a thing.

“Or, like most of your peers, you can remain here, and continue your education.” The professor offered. “I'd also like to offer you a place in the X-Men.”

“Fucking what?” Warren blurted out, laughing. Maybe swearing in front of Xavier wasn't the best thing to do, but the professor was clearly off his head.

Warren, in the Team of Idiots in Matching Unitards. No fucking way.

“I'm being serious, Warren. You've shown over the last few months that you're willing to change, and you have also shown that you wish to be part of something more.” Professor X was wearing his serious face. Warren had seen it directed at Erik, and now that it was on him, he understood why the other mutant had eventually folded.

“I truly believe you'd be a great fit with the group. Your friends will be happy to have you as part of the team-”

“Yeah, except for the part where I've already fought against them when we tried to end the world.” Warren pointed out. He knew the hard truth, that most of the kids here didn't trust him. They were right not to.

“So did Storm. She's shown a willingness to make amends. In your own way, so have you.”

Warren gave him a ‘you're-full-of-shit’ look. The professor was reaching, trying to find something where Warren knew there was nothing. He just wanted Warren's wings and abilities, to use him. Just like everyone else.

This was pointless. He didn't want to hear the professor's stupid plans, he wanted out so he could figure out what the hell to do with Kurt.

Kurt...how could he be on the same team as him after what happened? There was no way Kurt could trust him again.

“Even if you choose not to be part of the X-Men, I have another job I think you'd be perfect for.” The professor gave no indication that he was put off by Warren's thoughts, although he was certainly rooting around in there. “I'd like you to reach out to other young mutants who have been thrown out of their homes. I want you to bring them here.”

“Uh, seriously? You really think I'd be the person for that job?” Warren said bitterly. “I don't think I'd be a good ‘“spokesperson” for your school.” He threw up a pair of sarcastic air-quotes to prove his point.

“You're honest.” Xavier's voice was soft - he was still trying. Stubborn, Warren had to give him that. “Any kid in a desperate situation will appreciate that. You know better than anyone here what danger lies on the streets for young mutants.” Yeah, he did. “If you had known about this school when you were first thrown out, would you have tried to make it here?”

“I don't know,” Warren answered, because he didn't know. If he'd known then what he knew now, about what was waiting for him, he would have gone in a heartbeat. “I was kinda an idiot back then.” He'd thought he could handle himself. He thought wrong.

“So you understand the choices they're facing. This school needs to be open and welcoming to all, not just the students who have the means to get here. Mutants who have been thrown from their homes are most vulnerable. They deserve better, and you know it. I don't need to tell you how being here is better than being on the streets.”

“Depends,” Warren muttered, because, yeah, having somewhere safe to sleep every night was nice, but being constantly surrounded by kids kinda sucked after a while. At least here no one was trying to kill him on a regular basis. At least here he had Kurt. Or at least, he used to.

“Warren, I'm offering you this chance to help others, to make sure the injustices done to you don't happen to them. _You're_ what they need, some some poncy old man in a wheelchair.” Professor X smiled warmly at him. Warren had to admire his optimism. That was his superpower, not the psychic mind thing.

The professor was right, though. He knew that even though he'd had a hard time being homeless, and being passed from place to place, he had a better time than most. People were interested in him and his mutation - put them together and people only saw the angel.

He'd seen what happened to other mutant kids. The ones with ugly mutations, or the ones too weak, who fell prey to the monsters out there. It was not good.

“Well, I've given you a lot to think about, and I know you've got more on your mind. Like studying,” he added hurriedly when Warren gave him a sharp look. “Mull it over a bit, you don't have to decide now. You can take as long as you like. And whatever you choose, you're always welcome here. I want you to always keep that in mind.”

The professor was serious about that, Warren mused as he left the room. He was a good man, the kind of person Warren needed years ago. It was too late to help a shit-show like him now, but he was still trying.

And he wanted Warren, of all people, to help him make the world a better place. Get mutants off the streets and somewhere safe. Xavier was giving him a shot at making up for all the bad shit in his life.

Suddenly everything looked much clearer.

Instead of going to his really unnecessary math class, Warren instead climbed the stairs to the dorms. Kurt's room as on a different wing than his, but they'd hung out there before, before Warren ruined things.

From his jacket pocket, he found an old receipt and a nicked pen. There was just enough ink left for him to write **roof**. 

He slipped the note under the door and walked away, aiming for the trapdoor to the roof. If this didn't work he'd ask Jean to break the door down, then he'd tackle the teleporter before he escaped. But he hoped it would. If Kurt wanted to talk to him, he could, but the ball was out of Warren's court now. This was the best he could do, for now.


	5. Chapter 5

Kurt was already on the roof when Warren got up there. He didn't look surprised to see Warren, so he obviously wasn't barging in on him trying to get some space. And he stayed sitting on the ledge overlooking the gardens as Warren approached.

He looked like shit. Kurt's eyes were swollen, and his normally neat hair was a mess. _Fuck,_ Warren thought miserably as he sat down next to him. _That's all my fault._

Unconsciously, his wings spread when he say down, to help him balance. His right wing brushed Kurt's arm as it passed, but the blue mutant didn't react at all. He just looked exhausted.

Warren didn't know what to say, or where to start. So he just grabbed the strongest thought and ran with it.

“I fucked up.” He admitted. “I fucked up real hard, and I took my anger out on you, and I shouldn't have. Nothing happened because of you, everything was my fault. And I'm sorry.” That was probably the first time he'd apologized in a while, and he winced at how moody and insincere it sounded. 

“That's not true,” Kurt blurted out, because of course he wasn't going to let Warren take all the blame, he was too nice. “I shouldn't have kissed you, you were drunk and it wasn't right.”

“You saw your chance and went for it. Just waiting for the opportunity, right?” Warren waited for Kurt's guilty nod before continuing. “Probably thought that was your best shot. I don't blame you, I would have done the same. Me being drunk wasn't the problem.” He said firmly when Kurt opened his mouth to protest.

“It was wrong.” Kurt insisted. “I should never have done it.” Kurt's voice got louder as he became more worked up. He was actually upset for Warren, instead of because of him, he realized with shock. “You might be able to think nothing of it, but it matters to me. And I was the one that started it. It's my fault.”

Warren met his eyes, feeling unsure. He knew Kurt had blamed himself, but not like this. He couldn't even properly reassure the other mutant because Kurt felt so guilty. He didn't know what to do.

Kurt sniffed, rubbing his face with his clawed hand. “I'll make up for it, I promise you. I even-” he moved to stand, and Warren lurched out, grabbing his hand.

“Don't-” he blurted out, heart pounding. He couldn't let Kurt leave again, not like last time. The very idea of losing this shot now made his chest hurt. Kurt slowly sat back down, looking at Warren's fingers gripping his. He shifted his hand, so he and Warren were holding hands. He squeezed his fingers, softly, encouraging.

Warren exhaled, relief seeping through his veins. He couldn't look at Kurt when he asked _the_ question, the one that hurt the most. “Why did you leave? Why did you run off like that?” He just needed to know.

“I was scared.” Now Kurt was the one who wasn't looking at Warren. “I know what happens next, after kissing, and I...I wasn't ready for that:”

“You thought we were going to have sex,” Warren interrupted, trying to hide the lunatic laughter yanking at his throat, “on the roof?” Disbelief seeped into his voice. He couldn't believe _that_ was the reason for this mess.

“I was going to put us in my room.” Kurt admitted. Oh yeah, teleporter. That was a lot more obvious, a clearer opportunity that Warren would have thought. “I was already thinking, I could see it in my head, and I was just about to do it when my brain caught up and I realized that was a bad idea.” Kurt's tail whipped miserably behind him, but he hadn't let go of Warren's hand. Instead, he was gripping it like a lifeline, as if he was worried his confession would drive Warren off.

“It might not have been,” Warren wondered out loud. “I don't think I was sober enough to really do anything, but it would have shocked me out of it so we could talk.”

“I thought it'd be better if I left.” Kurt finally looked at him again, and Warren could see the genuine regret on his face. “I didn't know I'd hurt you this much.”

“You didn't know I'd be an insecure idiot who jumps to the wrong conclusions.” Warren sighed, chest finally loosening. Talking about this shit sucked, but they were getting somewhere. “I thought you were tricking me into kissing you, using me for a joke, and when you left I just thought you got what you were after.” He hated saying that, because it killed him that he'd thought Kurt was like that.

Kurt's eyes widened, horrified. “No,” he breathed out. “No, never.” His face was full of pity when he reached his other hand out to Warren's face, but for once it didn't anger Warren to see it. Warren closed his eyes, tried not to tense when Kurt touched him, so softly. Comfort. “I would never...how could-”

“That's all I've ever known,” Warren admitted, free hand coming up to touch Kurt's on his cheek. Emotions were bubbling in his chest, making him ramble. “That's all I could think of, and I was so mad, cause I'm so _tired_ of people doing shit to me. I didn't know-” he had to stop to swallow a sob, breathing harsh. “I thought there was no other reason you'd want to be around a piece of shit like me. Cause there's nothing I can give you except grief. You know that.”

Kurt had to know that, but he was moving close anyway, Warren could hear him shifting nearer. After all the shit Warren put him though, Kurt was still the one to reach out and pull Warren close, arms wrapping around his chest and burying his face in the crook of Warren's neck. Warren kept still, eyes closed. He didn't deserve this.

His wings came up again, flexing around Kurt while his own arms wrapped around the smaller. God he hated how good this felt. Because in the back of his mind was the dark thought that this wasn't real, that it was a trick, that he wasn't allowed this nice thing, that he was going to lose this like he'd lost every other damn thing in his life. But Kurt rubbed his hand up and down his back, and the idea went away.

“You're my friend, Warren,” Kurt whispered, his breath raising goosebumps on Warren's skin. “I don't want you to be hurt anymore, even by me. I'll be here, I can help, any way I can. If you'll let me.” The last part was further muffled when Kurt dropped his head further into Warren's chest.

Warren sighed and took the opportunity to pull Kurt even closer, so the blue mutant was chest-to-chest with him. Just like the last time (was it really just two days ago?), Kurt was warm and solid and perfect. He didn't need to think about hurting Warren, because Warren knew the most hurt was going to come from him.

He ran his fingers through Kurt's hair, encouraged him to tilt his head back to look at him. “You're not the one with the problem here.” He reminded him, and kept talking even when Kurt looked like he would protest. “I'm a mess, I know that, and I don't deserve someone like you in my life. But I'm gonna try. I want to fix this mess, I don't want to spend the rest of my life as an unworthy piece of shit. I need-” Warren searched Kurt's face, seeing no hate or anger, just warmth. “I need you to give me another chance. I don't deserve it, but-” 

Kurt was nodding before the words finished leaving his mouth. “Always,” he promised, a giant grin splitting his face. “I'm here for you, Warren, always. Whatever you need.” He moved in, but stopped himself, and Warren realized he was about to kiss him, but stopped. Because they'd talked about the worst stuff, but not that.

 _That_ at least Warren knew how to fix.

“Remember what I said the other night, about first times?” He gave Kurt a shy grin and shifted his grip on the other lower, teasingly. God he hoped he wasn't misreading this, and wasn't about to fuck up again so soon.

“Yes, you said they were always bad.” Kurt's voice sounded uncertain, but he wasn't pushing Warren away. If anything, he could feel those claws gripping his back tighter, right under his wings. That was encouraging.

“Well, that kiss itself wasn't bad, just what happened after.” Warren leaned close, loving the way Kurt's eyes drooped and fell to his lips. Yep, this was going the right way after all. “And all that bullshit I said about first relationships?”

“Yeah?” One of Kurt's hands loosened and came around to grip the front of his shirt. Warren wondered if he'd just get frustrated with Warren's teasing and just pull him in himself.

He looked Kurt dead in the eye and challenged: “Prove me wrong.”

He was ready for the ferocity in Kurt's kiss this time. Now that he was fully sober, and had a whole new appreciation for the other mutant. He kissed back with the same intensity as Kurt, and loved the little jump Kurt gave under his hands when he nipped his lip. The first kiss had been about testing, and was too sudden to enjoy properly. This kiss was so much better.

Kurt didn't pull away when Warren grabbed his ass again and lifted him closer. He was pulling at Warren too, the hand holding the front of his shirt twisting. Kurt opened his mouth, deepening the kiss, and Warren had to fight down a whimper. He brought one of his hands up to tangle his fingers in Kurt's hair, marveling at the feeling. 

Even the feeling of Kurt's clawed fingers near the base of his wings didn't make him tense. Kurt wouldn't hurt him. He amazed he got this chance again. To think he'd almost lost this...

The hand behind him came up to cup the back of his head and hold him still when Kurt leaned back, panting, to catch his breath. Warren ignored the pressure to lean forward to kiss Kurt's neck. He loved the throaty groan that Kurt made when his lips trailed up that soft blue expanse. He could do this forever.

“I don't want to stop,” Kurt whispered, “but I have my speech class soon.” Warren dropped his head to the other’s shoulder and snorted. Of course.

“Well, I'm glad we had that talk,” he said blithely when he sat back, but grinned and leaned up to kiss the offended look off Kurt's face. “We need to have more talks that end in kissing. _Lots_ more talks.”

He felt Kurt grin against the kiss, and felt Kurt's hands come up to frame his face. He was already loving how they felt on his skin. He felt like he was flying for the first time, giddy and free, and now he had someone to share it with.

“Thanks for not telling me to fuck off.” He whispered against Kurt's lips. He knew his second chance wasn't deserved, but the way Kurt kissed him said the other thought otherwise.

“I won't, ever.” Kurt promised. “I want...I want this to work. I know you don't think-”

“Kurt, we've already talked about how I'm an idiot. Okay? Nothing I say is right, so I need you to keep proving me wrong. You're welcome to prove me wrong as often as you want.”

Kurt laughed, and Warren realized how much he had missed that sound. Kurt was smiling and happy again, and Warren felt lighter than he had in years.

It wasn't perfect, but it was better than anything he could hope for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's the end. Warren still needs therapy though.  
> I've thought about re-writing chapter two from Kurt's POV, but that would be too painful even for my cold dead black heart.  
> Thank you everyone who's commented, you're darlings.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't condone or recommend making out with drunk people. Talk it out kids.  
> There may be more to this sometime.


End file.
